I want to say thank you to my wife and all the other stay at home mothers. Despite demeaning comments by Geraldine Ferraro and other worldly feminists, I see motherhood as God's highest calling and believe stay at home moms are doing the Lord's work. When you excel in a career, you may have a positive impact on a few people for a few hours a week or even a few years in the best of cases, but when you excel as a Christian mother, you impact God's Kingdom for generations.
Now, that I have a few years of observations on such things, I want to encourage women to arrange their lives in a way that their families don't have to compete with their careers. I know many, many women who have left very successful careers to stay at home and I have never heard one who regretted it. On the other side of that coin, I have heard many career women being torn at the seams by the demands of career and family and the mythical balance between the two. Moms are not supposed to miss the most important moments of their children's lives and wives are not supposed to practice abstinence, especially the kind resulting from career induced exhaustion. Moms, your children do not care how good you are at your job, just how much you invest in them and how much you love their dad. If you want to do what is best for your children, there's a good chance that means giving them more of your time and giving your job less time (maybe zero time!).
My wife has always been a stay at home mom and it has been tremendously rewarding for her. What other job requires a knowledge economics, culinary arts, anatomy, medicine, counseling, fashion, and stain removal? Moms have their own organizations and clubs like Mothers of Preschoolers (known as MOPs, but I told Cammie she should start a Hot MOPs chapter for all the good-looking moms like her:-), JustMoms.com, and local PTAs (which may be the new pipeline to the presidency:-).
Cammie achieved undeniable supermom status when our second boy arrived. It is hard enough to take care of three children, but taking care of three with my DNA and temperament (who must fight with each other constantly to be happy) make Cammie a daily miracle worker. Add to this that I am about to leave for the fifth time on deployment you get the picture that Job probably would have looked to Cammie to learn about patience. For those of you who are not military, just know that deployments are always the time when things go haywire at home. On back to back deployments, Cammie had to have both of our long-time (11 plus years) family pets, Charlie and Pile, put to sleep, and then had her minivan rear-ended by a school bus at a red light. Our family has been blessed compared to other military families, but I would ask for special prayers for all military moms. If you know a military mom whose husband is deployed, call her today and just let her talk with an adult.
Again, I want to thank all the stay at home moms and point to the Bible for a picture of how important they are. Joseph was selected as Jesus's earthly father due to his lineage. God selected Mary because of her virture to be Jesus stay at home mother. How ridiculous would it have been for Mary to tell God that she couldn't take care of Jesus because she had to go to her job? What job is more important than raising your child? Isn't every child a gift from God? Don't they all deserve our best as parents?
I understand how scary life changes can be and if you are a career woman who is also a mother, I want to share a note from a friend who left a successful and rewarding career to stay at home. I think it is a masterpiece of encouragement for other women facing that choice. I just asked her if she could write a short note on what it meant to her to be a stay at home mom and here is what she wrote:
Wow, a short note? Not sure how to make this life I am choosing to live short!!<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />
Bottom line is I LOVE IT!! Now that coming from someone who LOVED and I do mean LOVED my full time job!! I was/am the type that puts 110% into things that I do and I was consumed by my job to save other people's children...I was so consumed that I almost lost my family in order to save others...but with that said, the LORD is an amazing Savior and Grace giver!!
The sacrifices that I have made were many...I lost a LOT of control, but gained self reliance and a smile that greets me as if to say everything will be fine...and in loosing the control that I thought I liked, I have learned to lean on God and others to help even me out!!
Just this past week my best friend needed me...EVERYDAY and I was able to go help her and had I not been there I'm not sure what she would have done...if I still had my paid job, I wouldn't have been able to help her...I don't think she will ever forget it either!!
I've come to realize that I can go through the day and having nothing to show for it, but know that I accomplished enough just by being here with my daughter and being able to get my son without worrying about my paid job....my son even though he is in school loves me being home, he likes that feeling of Mommy is there and no one else (or another child) is going to be first on my list!!
I've given up a lot and I guess if I had been keeping score I might have seen a lot of things that I gave up more right now, but I honestly don't think that they matter that much anymore!! After you get some type of routine down, whether it happens every day the way you plan it or not, you forget about the control and other things that seemed important and are just able to look at your life...although I only see small rewards maybe like once a month or so I believe the end result will be Pleasing in the Sight of the Lord!!!
